by Angela

“I’m new here.” It’s my trump card and I don’t mind using it but sometimes I wish I didn’t have to. It can be tiring living out of structure, habits, and the comfort of knowing.  With the time I have to myself during the week, I have been exploring the community around me and exploring within- how should I spend my time? What is God’s plan for me? I have come to realize that despite being somewhat of an introvert, I have a need for connection as well. Which means getting out of my comfort zone and showing up to places as a newbie. These past several weeks, I’ve kind of made a rule for myself. If I come across something in my day to day or in my search for how to use my time, maybe on the internet or in the community newspaper or someone tells me about something, really anything that looks like it would be fulfilling, I should “just do it” and try not to second guess. I would like to believe that doing so, being less planned and structured, gives room for God’s spirit to lead. While volunteering has been on my agenda since leaving the US, what I’ve encountered has been an abundance of opportunities to connect with others. I have found myself at different things such as a women’s bible study, a seated Pilates class, an over 50 women’s social group meetup at a coffee shop (age not required), a social art club, a zumba class, visiting with a local American artist in her workshop, and walking with a new friend hearing about the history of the area . So far I have been struck at how welcoming everyone is and at how many opportunities there are to connect with others through community led groups. And I am starting to cross paths with people more and more. The mosaic artist, I see nearly every morning on my walk back from the girls’ school. One lady at the women’s coffee club is attending the zumba class. The woman who helps Aiden who has autism at school (previous post by Audrey), knows a lady in the bible study. The local librarian who lives on our street, I saw at the cafe. I thought I would be filling up my time with volunteer activities but am pleasantly surprised to find these social connections that filling my cup so to speak. I am recognizing more fully the value of connection in life.

I know I am biased to think this place is amazing, because it is new and different and exciting, and I came open to new ideas and eager for an adventure. Would I find similar experiences if I was a newbie in Louisville? Are the people here more friendly? Is this merely the result of me having more time to myself? It has brought up questions to which I am not sure the answers, but I find it hard not to conclude that there are more opportunities for social connection here. 

No discussion about the community here would be appropriate without pointing out that there are heaps of people who have immigrated here from outside of NZ- from the UK, Ireland, Scotland, South Africa, India, Sri Lanka, China, Canada. The diversity is impressive and unlike anywhere else I have experienced. Perhaps it is this heterogeneity in the makeup that makes everyone more friendly. Perhaps without a clearly defined “us” there can’t be a “them.” Have you ever felt like a “them”? I think we have all felt it at one point or another especially in middle school but even as an adult, I have felt it. Having not grown up in Louisville and not attended a catholic high school, some social situations have made me feel like I was on the outskirts of a club and not allowed in. New Zealanders are known for being proponents of “a fair go”- the notion that everyone should have equal chance and opportunity to succeed. Maybe this “fair go” mentality decreases competition and lends itself to inclusivity and cooperation. I am surprised by the lack of feeling like a “them” here.   

On the volunteer front, I have explored a few different things some of which are starting to take hold. I checked out a program for moms and babies called “Space” led by Parenting Place, a family charity in NZ. According to the website, there are 350 programs across the country. The program I visited was run by two facilitators for a group of about 10 mom and baby duos (one dad too!). The 2-hour program consists of time to connect and share experiences, songs, parenting advice, morning tea, craft, and play time. Parents enroll after birth and the program runs weekly for 30 weeks. There are also social/music geared baby mom groups called “Mainly Music” that I haven’t gotten a chance to see but they seem quite pervasive; there are two within 5-10 minutes from me. While attending the Space program, I heard parents discuss their struggles like baby’s sleeping and deciding about returning to work. It brought me back to that time in my life with my first child and how vulnerable I felt. I wished there was a program like this when I was at that point in life. The only program I feel I encountered as a new mom was one geared towards breast-feeding support. I wonder if there are enough of these opportunities for new moms back home? Or maybe the longer maternity leave here allows such programs to exist? I decided not to continue as a volunteer at this program, but it was a thought provoking experience. 

For those of you that don’t know me, simply said, I love older people! I am a geriatrician and have had various roles including seeing patients in nursing homes, home visits, and providing consultative care in a dementia clinic. Spending time with a friendly group of elderly doing chair Pilates and chatting over tea afterwards spoke to my heart and reminded me that being around older people rejuvenates me (more than being around babies) and is why I became a geriatrician. This has led me to seek volunteer opportunities with this age group. One is a cognitive stimulation group through an organization called Dementia Auckland. This group has about 5 participants, meets weekly (at a building in the botanic gardens), and is led by a facilitator that goes through a structured program of different topics. We don’t have an equivalent of this in the US so it is interesting to see how the system here meets the needs of those with dementia. The other group I have attended is a social and activities group for isolated older people and those with disabilities, through an organization called Communicare. Communicare serves the Auckland area with 17 of these what they call “friendship centers.” The program I went to uses the space within a community center and operates weekly for 3 hours with about twelve participants some with caregivers doing exercises, games, having tea and lunch. In the US, we have adult day centers that are somewhat similar, but cost a lot and serve participants with more needs- not quite the same. I enjoy seeing things that don’t have equivalents in the US, things I may not have thought of myself to address needs. So yea, I think I am going to stick with these two volunteer roles.

I’ll end this lengthy and introspective post with some eye candy- pictures from our recent trip to the West Coast. Maraetai where we live is on the east coast. The West Coast area is somewhat remote being on the other side of a large regional park and no direct motorway access. We drove about 2 hours to get there including winding roads with no shoulders. We started off with a hike to a pretty waterfall (had a look at some eels too) and then headed to the beach for views. Piha beach is (arguably) Auckland’s most famous beach, with black sand and an untamed landscape. We ended the day hiking along the rugged coast to an area that once was home to a fortified Maori village- hard to believe a village was once there high above the sea. The surprising thing about these beautiful areas and others we have seen so far in NZ is the lack of commercialization. Maybe there is just too much beauty here to commercialize. Overall, I agree with others when they say the West Coast is stunning. Standing high above and looking out over the ocean at the horizon was one of those awe inspiring moments.