by Angela

A calling. That term seems only appropriate for someone giving a sermon or evangelizing. And as a Catholic, it makes me pretty uncomfortable to apply that phrase to my life. But, I feel obligated to give credit where credit is due and there have been so many pieces that have seemed to fall into place to allow us to be here that it seems ungrateful not to include God in my story. So, as uncomfortable as it is, I am sharing it with you. Sometimes we have to take a leap of faith that if God wants us to go somewhere, he will pave the way.

The idea to come here started during a psychiatry conference. Danny heard a talk given by a colleague about her experience working here. Short term work to fill a vacancy is known as “locum tenens” and some physicians just bounce around different jobs and places doing “locums” work. New Zealand, being more open to locums doctors than other countries, is quite clever as it seems a successful way to fill the worldwide doctor vacancy. During COVID, this idea became more appealing to us as something we could do too. COVID, a time of uncertainty and change. Maybe it was needing to put our hope into something. Maybe it was realizing that our lives could be disrupted for months at a time, that we could lose our normalcy and still be okay. Maybe it was that point in our marriage where we needed something to bring us together. Maybe God’s calling. Maybe a combination of them all. We set our sights on 2024 and focused on one hurdle at a time to see if it would actually work for us. Through my anxiety, I kept reminding myself to put my trust in God. Although I may appear calm on the outside, I am actually quite an anxious person.

Hurdle 1- Danny’s job. Danny became medical director practically by default during COVID when the other full-time physicians at his facility left for higher paying jobs. As the only full-time physician, initially this challenge seemed insurmountable. Would they be able to hire locums in his place? Then the facility hired two NPs and another psychiatrist was filling in here and there. The extra coverage made things more promising. His boss, new since COVID, was agreeable to him leaving for 6 months but Danny still was worried about how they were going to handle things in his absence. Then in August, an awesome newly trained forensic psychiatrist was hired, the first one since Danny in 2015. We were so thankful. Now we could leave things in good hands. 

Hurdle 2- My mom’s health. Some of you may not know that my mom has metastatic breast cancer. She was diagnosed in late 2018. It is not curable but the treatments can extend survival. Several months ago, my mom’s cancer was starting to grow again after being on first line treatment. I worried that she would decline while I was gone. I accompanied my mom to an oncology appointment and shared my concerns. The oncologist encouraged me to go. So I tentatively put my concerns aside. My mom is doing well now on a second line treatment, her cancer seems to be responding to the treatment, and I pray she continues to do well. 

Hurdle 3- Housing. We just finished an expensive house renovation, spending more than we planned. Our idea of leaving our newly renovated house pristine and untouched would put us in a hole financially. As we started searching for a short-term 6-month 4 bedroom furnished rental in NZ that fit in our budget, our excitement dwindled. There were almost no options that showed availability for when we would arrive except airbnbs and the airbnbs for 6 months were way out of our price range. My anxiety started to grow. It was during our parish’s Lord of Miracles celebration that I said a prayer that God would help us find renters and housing. Three days later, on the same day, I got confirmation that a company wanted to rent our house for their employees and that a house we saw online in NZ was available for us to rent within both our time frame and budget. I was blown away by this answered prayer!

Hurdle 4- Timing. We were told not to buy flights or plan on anything until our Visas were approved. We were planning to come here mid January and our renters were moving in on January 14th. After Christmas, we still didn’t have Visas. We were on the edge of our seats waiting, watching as flight prices increased. Danny finally got word in early January but it wasn’t an approval, it was a request for a background check and fingerprinting because of two speeding tickets he had received in his lifetime. We were dismayed. Luckily it didn’t take long to complete and send in. Then on January 9th we got word, Danny’s visa was approved! We bought flights that night for the following week and another gift from God, the flights through Delta were the cheapest we had seen yet. 

So now we are here, I believe through God’s grace and I am keeping my eyes out for what God has in store for us or me while we are here. During church last weekend, the opening song was the Servant Song, a special song for Danny and I that we made a part of our wedding, and I was reminded of God’s presence. I feel incredibly blessed to have felt God’s helping hand through this journey so far. And I hope his spirit continues to guide us. I think that perhaps anxiety is a blessing in disguise. That because of my anxiety, I am led to rely on God.  

Faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen (Hebrews 11: 1)